Fides Quae Creditur
by rowenagrayson
Summary: Chap. 4! before the masquerade that changed our lives. The teen titans have been invited to a masquerade with all the other superheroes. But this is not an ordinary masquerade. raexrob.
1. forbidden love

**Well, here is my first fan fic…..so don't be mean. Anyway, I just got this idea by seeing a movie(and no, it wasn't masquerade madness), whatever. Summarizing…. **

**The teen titans and all superheroes are invited to a masquerade(woohooo!!!!) to fell in love with people, but not by their appearance, for what they are on the inside…..hahahaha. A raexrob fic. Hope you guys like it!**

**¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨´rob and rae together forever!!!!¨¨¨¨´¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨¨´**

Chapter 1.

It was the typical day at the T-Tower. Cyborg and BeastBoy were having the usual fight "tofu vs. meat". Starfire was trying unsuccessfully to stop it. Raven sat alone in the u-shaped couch, open book in right hand and a cup of herbal tea in the left one. Robin just sat there pretending to read the newspaper ( I know, but superheroes have to keep track about news) while from the corner of his eye he was very worried watching Raven.

Robin had this little mini crush on Starfire, I mean, who wouldn't? she was good looking and always was jumping of joy.

But there was always Raven, she was a total mystery to him. Everyone said that she was a Goth, but he didn't think so. To him she was just……………..different. she was also beautiful. She had this gorgeous amethyst eyes and her hair had a deep shadow of purple. Raven also had an amazing body, when she didn't hide it in her cape.

He kinda had a crush on her too, well not exactly a crush, or maybe it was, hell, he didn't know. But he certainly preferred to be with her than with Starfire. But he always feared and had rejection from the Goth girl. So he just used Starfire as a distraction.

He finally decided to go and make Raven some company. He stood up and walked up to her.

On that moment Starfire was watching him. She had always loved Robin, he was just so……so……..perfect. but when he attempted to talk to Raven, she couldn't help but to feel jealous. So while they were "talking", she wanted him to talk to him instead of Raven. So she walked to where Robin and Raven were sitting down.

"Hello friend Robin and friend Raven"

"Hi Starfire" Raven said in her monotone voice.

"Star I have to talk to raven, you see…." He couldn't finish because in that moment, Starfire dragged him into the kitchen.

Raven just let out a sigh. She loved Robin since the end of the world, when she finally defeated her father. Since that moment she was now able to feel (and love had been

especially happy about that). But Raven knew that Starfire loved Robin and every people in Jump city said that they would make the perfect couple. So, Raven didn't tried to get in their way.

In the tower there were also Cyborg and BeastBoy. Cy was to her the "wise", good, playful and understanding big brother. And BB was just the caring, "funny" and annoying little brother. To them she was their sister, one they should take care of. Specially Cyborg, he was sometimes to overprotective with her. She didn't loved it, but neither she hated it. She just felt good with it, because it made her feel part of a familiy.

Star was to her just a good friend. One with she would spend some time. But she also felt uncomfortable with her sometimes, because of Robin and her love for him. Raven was to Starfire a best friend. Of course, she didn't know that Raven loved Robin. But sometimes she couldn't help but feel jealous towards Raven when Robin went to talk to her.

At all this what Raven could just think was '_damn hormones'_

She went then to her room to meditate. She really needed it. Robin just watched helplessly as he saw Raven heading towards her room. _'Raven, my beloved Raven. What can I do for you to love me the way I do?'_ he thought.

Back in her room, Raven was trying to meditate, but she couldn't, ant it was all the fault of a certain masked boy with messy black hair. She finally gave up and decided that she would not be able to meditate anymore. She then went to one of her bookshelves. But for the first time, she had a problem with picking up a book to read. She just couldn't decide which book should be the best. She finally gave up for a romance one. She was starting to like these stories, she somehow felt that those books were specially written to her. Well anyways, she didn't want any of the other titans to know she read those books. She wanted to keep her Goth image and a romance book was too……..Starfire for her. She then headed to the roof.

She especially liked that place because she knew that any of the titans went there, (they only went there to be on the pool and to play volleyball, but it was now the sunset, so anyone would go there) well, maybe Robin. He went there many times, but he was now practicing in the gym. Raven also liked that place because of the peace she felt there. the picture of the sunset in the horizon, the sea and the peaceful noise it made, the birds. Everything was just so relaxing.

She was reading peacefully about how Sarah loved Quevin, but her best friend, Dana also loved him. Unfortunately, Quevin seemed to love Dana. In the end, Quevin declared his love to Sarah, she admitted that she loved him, he then came closer to her and closer, closer, their mouths were almost touching and……

"Raven?" someone interrupted her

"What?!" she snapped, very angry that someone dared to interrupt her.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt you" the sweet voice oh her secret love Robin relaxed her"

"No….it's okay. Its just that the story was getting to its climax. But its fine. I needed a little break though"

"Well, I'm relieved to hear that. Which story are you reading anyway?"

"Oh, its just a book I just picked to pass the time"

"You didn't answer my question"

"And so what?"

"C'mon Raven, you always force everyone to answer your questions"

"So?"

"Raven, c'mon……"

"NO!!!"

"And what will you do to me if I take the book away from you?"

"Just try"

" I will" and with an extremely fast move, Robin took away the book from her.

"Hey, that's my book, you have no right of doing that!!!"

"Just let me see………..WHOA!!!!! _'forbidden love'_ ?!?!?!?!"

"Yes, and so what?"

"No….its okay, reading this its not wrong. Its just that I never thought of you reading this kind of stories"

"Well, as I said before, it was just a book I picked randomly. Its not my style, just an unimportant book to pass the time. "

"I've already read this book and I loved it. In which chapter are you?"

"17"

"The best chapter. Now I now why you were so mad at me when I interrupted you"

"Wow. You figured it out by yourself bird brain. It's the end of the world"

"By the way…you said it was just a book you picked randomly. Then………."

"Then what Blunder Boy?"

"Just two things"

"I am hearing"

"Why were you so mad at me for interrupting you from reading an _unimportant_ story? And why where you so absorbed into that _random book_?"

"I wasn't so absorbed in it"

"Yeah you were"

" You know what? This is pointless. I should be sleeping now or maybe meditating. I don't know, but certainly something more useful than being around with you."

" You haven't answer my questions yet"

"As if I care" with that she walked away and as she passed trough the door, she slammed it in his face. He was surprised by this, so he did the only thing he could do: he ran after her. He knew he should move fast or he would never catch up with her. Fortunately, he reached her just in time, because when she was about to close the door of her room, he grabbed her arm and delicately spun her around.

"What?" she snapped

"Why are you mad at me?"

"I'm not mad at you"

"Then why did you ran away?"

"Because you were annoying me"

"Annoying you? I just asked what book were you reading. And I asked it politely and gently"

"…….."

"But then you started being rude towards me and I was just giving you the favor back"

"But why did you decided to come to talk to me?"

"Because I was bored and wanted something new"

"Well, if you think that I'm just someone to pass time with when you have no one left, I will just go to my room, and leave me ALONE!!!!"

"No Raven, I didn't mean it that way. What I meant is that I was bored from not talking to you and by something new I meant the topic we talked about"

"Oh….just one question"

"Tell me"

"Why talking about my book? What's so special about it?"

"Its just that I never thought of you reading this kind of storiees"

"Oh"

"But its fine, I mean, its really nice to see you trying something new, different"

"If you tell someone I kill you"

"Ok. I thought you were more the kind of person that read horror books"

"I just had finished reading all the Goth books I could find"

"But why romance? I mean, you could have just chosen a novel or a play. But romance?"

"I know, but its just that the story attracted me, you know? I think its somehow like my life". At this last comment, Robin just smiled and Raven was in shock for revealing so much about her. She then ran to her room and she slammed the door in Robin's face, but he didn't mind. He was happy thinking about Raven and how her life could be compared to that story.

**´**

**A.N.// so, what do you think??? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW. This story is planned to be of various chapters. But if u guys don't review, then I'll just leave it. Sorry if there were any grammar or spelling mistakes, its because I'm from Mexico so….. **

**Please REVIEW!!!!! **


	2. why are you doing this?

**I'm so sorry for not updating before, I don't really have an exuse…. Just that I'm very lazy aanndd just two people reviewed (thanks kurumi-chan and sailorsmarsfire93 u rock!!!) and well, here is the next chapter**

**Disclaimer: the teen titans are not mine….geez, I don't even have a car of my own **

Chapter 2.

By unspoken agreement, neither Robin nor Raven talked about their last encounter. Raven didn't give too much importance to it. But Robin was a whole different story. He spent nights repeating in his head what had occurred that cold night….the book….Raven's words and actions…..all was giving circles in his head.

He loved Raven. He truly did. He loved everything about her, her smile, her intellect, her sarcasm, her legs, her huge curves, he even loved her face when she was pissed off…..okay he was madly in love. The bad thing was that she doesn't seem to return his feelings and that was really frustrating. Luckily, he had Starfire to help him, though momentarily, forget about Raven. He normally went with Starfire to his room to discuss ( or make) private things. When Starfire was getting uncomfortable with the situation, both decided to formalize their relationship, officially going out. At first this started to work, he could temporally forget about Raven; however, soon he found comparing Starfire to Raven. He compared from the shine on their hair to their attitudes. When he kissed Starfire he always wondered what would be like to kiss Raven. When he and Star went out, he wondered what would be like to take Raven to a fancy restaurant. When he gave Star some piece of jewelry, he wondered how it would look like on Raven or her face when he gave it to her. In short, he loved Raven with all his heart.

"What are you staring at, boy blunder?" asked Raven, who didn't found it pleasing to be the target of the Boy Wonder's imagination.

"Nothing in particular…" he answers vaguely before standing up. Raven just eyed him with caution as he goes to the kitchen to prepare himself a cup of coffee.

It was 6 o'clock and for Raven's luck only the two birds were awake.

**Raven's POV**

I felt his stare on me. Oh! Stupid boy blunder! Don't look at me like that! Enough! What are you thinking? Okay Raven, relax, find your center _azarath metrion zynthos, azarath metrion zynthos. _Okay, now that's better. What was that?

Since the book incident, I haven't been able to be myself, I mean, when I look at Robin, my heart beats faster and I can't think clearly. And when I'm in the gym training with him, I just can't stop to imagine him, his muscles, his toned body, his……okay Raven, enough! I really try to stop thinking about him in that way, but I can't. Am I in…love? I better not answer myself. I risk to give one more sidewalks glance to the bird boy. Damn it, he is still looking at me.

"What are you staring at, Boy Blunder?" I ask him and he snaps out of whatever trance possessed him. "Nothing in particular…" he answers vaguely before standing up. Okay much better.

I start to read again when something revolves in my stomach.

"You're hungry" I hear him say.

"You have eyes" I answer him.

**Normal POV**

He says something inaudible and she realizes she has been to harsh with him. She sighs.

She felt truly sorry for him, but this was the only way it could be between them. He had Starfire and she just had no one. She didn't want to interfere in the happiness of her two friends, she didn't want to intrude. She loved him, yes, but true love meant sacrifice, and as she truly loved him she would let him be happy with Starfire. It was better this way. So, she was just mean and cold towards them so they didn't see the truth.

Her stomach growled again and she could see Robin smirking, apparently he had also heard it.

"Now you can't tell me you aren't hungry" says Robin hoping she would come and eat something with him, as he wanted to tell her something very important.

"Shut up and leave me alone, or is that to difficult for you to do?" was her harsh reply and she hopes he understands.

"Why are you doing this to me?!". Robin yells, frustrated for not being able to talk to her like a civilized person and not being able to tell her what he feels for her.

"Doing what?"

"Giving me harsh replies, sarcastic answers. I think it's enough Raven" he says this time more calm as he gets closer to her.

"I treat everyone like that. Even Cyborg, Beastboy or Starfire" and with that she flew to her room leaving a very frustrated Robin.

**A.N./ again, I'm so sorry for not updating before. Sorry to for the length of this chapter but I'm out of time. I promise next chapter would be much longer. So to not keep you waiting I promise I'll post a new chapter every two weeks. **

**And I almost forgot a reviewer. Thanks witchofdanight1316. With that is 3 reviewers I have. Thanks a lot you guys. And please review.**

**Oh and the image is not mine. I found it at devianart**


	3. I 've seen it in your eyes

**Wow****, the first day chap. 2 was posted I received 2 reviews. That's so cool. I promise I will make the chapters ****much**** larger and forget what I said about updating every two weeks, I don't have enough time, but still I won't wait months and months to update. Again thank you for your reviews witchofdanight1316, brneyedgirl, ducky, Rachel, kurumi-chan, sailormarsfire93. You guys are so awesome and cool. That's why I dedicate this chapter to you. **

**So, here we are, on with the story.**

_**Rob and Rae belong together.**_

Chapter 3.

_Why Raven, why_ Thought Robin as he crossed the crystal doors of the gym. _Well, at least a good work out will help me clear my mind... I hope so... _He started doing his usual routine. First, he had to warm up, stretch a little and then he started the real training. Unfortunately, he was having a bad time clearing his head. First he had to get the images of Raven out of his head, next concentrate on his routine, and then keep his mind and thoughts away from raven at least during 30 punches. Well, here we start. 2 punches, 8 punches, 16 punches, 24 punches, 27 punches, 29 punches . . . . . and when he was about to reach his goal, suddenly the image of the dark enchantress appeared again. Damn it! He screamed, frustrated that he couldn't manage to not think about Raven in at least 30 punches. So, he started to increase the intensity and velocity of his normal workout until he realized, decided that with that routine he would never be able to clear his mind.

His hands were resting on his knees. He was panting and there were sweat drops covering his face when he heard some footsteps. _Let's see Cyborg's foot are to heavy, so, it's not him, Starfire is usually jumping and she doesn't like to train with terrestrial equipment, so it's also not Starfire. Raven…wait…no Raven, she can't be. So that only leaves Beast Boy. Oh no!!! BeastBoy no he hat-_

"Hey Robin!, want some training companion???" he heard Beast Boy's voice before he came in into the gym. He feared the worst. Beast Boy. Its not that he hated Beast Boy; is just that trying to do Robin's routine, he always messed up with all the weapons and equipment. Or he got injured and then Beast Boy would be all day in front of the giant T.V playing videogames nonstop with the max. Volume. Ok, maybe that was normal. But then he would start giving orders and asking for favors and his only excuse was that he was injured and they had to do things, favors for him. Of course, Starfire was the only one doing them but still, hearing him shouting for help was annoying. Really annoying.

His thoughts were interrupted by a certain green changeling (who looked really funny with sweat pants and bare chest) that appeared at the door.

"Can I join you?" Beast Boy asked. Robin was definitely not in the mood to put up with him, but he didn't want to be rude to him either so he went for this answer

"Look Beast Boy, I increased my routine and I seriously don't think you can keep up with me and…." He didn't know what else to say, fortunately for him, he didn't have to continue any more . . .

"DUDE, what's that smell?!?!?!?! It STINKS in here!!!!!!!!!!". The changeling said as he fully entered the gym.

"Really?? I don't smell anything". But as Robin raised his arm to smell his armpit, he perceived a horrible smell. Sweat. Long hours of exercise. Long hours of trying to forget the dark empath without success. "Ughhhh!!!" he exclaimed, but this could give Robin an advantage…….

"Well, this fragrance is the result of my new routine, as I said before, but you can surely join me…"

"Are you kidding?! I'm not training with you if I'll stink like that!" And he pointed at the really wet outfit of his leader. "'Cuz then, the ladies won't be following me"

"Do you even have girls that think of you?" the one wearing the mask teased him.

"Dude, of course I have" and Robin heard those words like echoes because the green changeling had already left the room. _Probably he went to the bathroom._ Robin half laughing half concerned for his friend thought. He then shrugged and returned to his routine. _Well here we go again, an extra-hard routine trying to not think of . . . No Robin!!! Don't think of her!!! I better get started. _

Instead, the masked leader went to a bench that was near where he was standing, he grabbed a towel and passed it over his sweaty face, and then he proceeded to do the same with his neck, which was in the same state as his face. When he was finished, Robin took a look at the towel he had grabbed and he saw it was completely wet from all the sweat he had on his face and neck. _Well maybe bb is right, I'm a little sweaty today._ He then lowered his nose to it to smell it and when he did; our blunder boy wished he would have never done that.

After the dizziness that the odor provoked him passed, Robin decided that, talking with BB, drying and hydratating himself had already took time and that he had rested a lot. So the hero went to continue his routine from where he had left it. And he was doing a pretty good job, because he was now over the 27th punch and still no Ravens on his mind. He just needed three more to accomplish his goal. Two more…one more….yes he was going to finally make it. He was already celebrating on the inside; his fist was in mid-air when …

"Yo rob!." A loud and non.-welcomed voice rang through Robin's ears. And he had no more choice but to turn around, which he did with a pointed slowliness, so like Raven did, which was quite scary.

"Speak quickly Cyborg" though panting; you could still hear clearly the command and angry voice of the team's leader. As a result, the metal man told the short version.

"K, the grass stain is vomiting in our bathroom. I asked him what happened and the only thing he would say is 'ask spiky hair'. What happened man?" and at his insides, Cyborg knew already the answer, though seeing his leader's temper, he decided to not say a word about it.

"Dunno, he just came to train, and then left saying something about ladies following him, and me stinking." Robin said still panting, still not kindly. And Cyborg knew he had to leave soon or a certain bird will be flushing all his temper on him.

"I'm leaving then. But do all of us and yourself a favor, take a shower, put that uniform in some disinfecting solution and deodorize this room." He said as he turned around to leave, which he did.

_Damn, why does everyone keeps saying that I smell bad, no wait horrible?!_ Robin thought as he entered the kitchen. He needed badly a big, cold glass of refreshing water. Seeing he had already finished the one he brought with him to the gym. After some seconds of looking, he finally found a big glass (similar to Raven's favorite mug, which he had given to her last Christmas, a year ago ….)

"Well, maybe it's because you do smell like you haven't take a bath in quite some weeks." A dry, throaty, monotone voice said behind him, and Robin turned around to see the beautiful girl he secretly loved. She was clad with her usual cloak, sitting Indian style, holding her favorite mug, which was left with almost no tea by now, with both her hands. She was in front the giant window. It was around 9:00 am ant it gave them (her) a pretty good view of Jump's city bay. It seemed that she had just finished her meditation, (which was quite strange, seeing that she didn't meditate very often by now because they had defeated her father). The reason of meditating, he did not know, maybe it was to (hopefully) calm down her nerves, maybe it was just out of boredom, maybe it was just to . . . . Whatever.

"Raven." He says as he approaches her, and it was Raven's turn to face the other bird.

"Robin." She said with a nod and a tone that obviously stated she had not forgotten their little argument just a couple of hours ago. With a tired, long and apologetic sigh he continued

"Raven, look I'm sorr-"

"Listen boy blunder"-the empath said as she stood up, being now at her companion's eye level.- "If you don't want me to probe my new torture methods on you, I suggest for you to go and take a good bath, and make sure you use soap and shampoo." The dark witch interrupted him, and she sounded quite funny, considering she was covering her nose with, now, one free hand. Thank god Robin was wise enough to successfully hold the chuckle that was waiting at the base of his throat. But he wasn't that wise as to not make an extremely exaggerated bow that clearly showed mockery in front of her at the time he said

"As the lady wishes" at this, said 'lady' just gave him a cold glare and answered in a low, almost-demonic voice

"Feel lucky that she didn't peek off your skin." And that last threat was all Robin needed to go to his room and grab a clean uniform, then head to the bathroom to take to take a cool shower.

And he left there a very depressed empath on the living room.

She was depressed. She was tired. Tired of being. Tired of this life and all the turns that came with it. She was also getting weaker and weaker as time passed. You would say, just like everyone else did, that this tiredness and weakness came from not being able to show her emotions. That was truth, well in part. There was more to it than just some crazy emotions and hormones.

The strongest reason for her weakness is that she was dying, and Raven knew it. Sure, she was immortal, and consequently would live forever as long as no outside, external forces acted upon her. But these forces were actually acting upon her. Someone was sucking her live.

This Raven knew. This Raven allowed.

Why? Why would she let someone end with her life? And who would it be? Because a vow. A vow she had made some time ago to protect everyone from her horrendous father, Trigon the Terrible. Back when they had fought him (though everyone thought he had been defeated) at the time Raven seemed to exterminate her father, she knew she couldn't do it. And if she tried, she would die. She didn't have neither the knowledge nor the strength to cast a spell, a maleficium that could put and end to her abominable father's life.

So, she was left with only one choice: send him far away from her. But to where? A prison was the most reasonable and also the safest thing to do at that time. So she send him there. Ironically, the prison was in hell, where he was ruler of. But it was also the place that had a very, very powerful spell. With enough force as to held him in one place. But for this spell to take place there needed to be a guard at all time. The guard had to be powerful. And Raven didn't have the time and patience to deal with her father, so she hired a guard.

And it was this same guard the one who was sucking her life out.

But then again, who was this guard? Well, the only one who could watch over Trigon was Hades himself. So she hired him, or rather, made a vow with him, an unbreakable vow with the 3rd lord of hell. He promised to watch over Trigon nonstop only if she gave up her immortality, her life to him. Having no other choice, Raven agreed.

That's why every month or so, Raven felt a part of her life-force, a part of her soul, a part of her; being taken away from a hell's bitch. The price she had to pay to keep her friends (specially the boy wonder) safe.

Another reason for her being tired of life was actually her past life.

As Raven was immortal, she was old. Old to Earth's standards, but young to her people, to her planet. And to both worlds she looked young, as if age and time had no effect on her. This she should thank to both her parents. And as she was old, she had committed quite some really repercussive actions. She herself was now wearing a sign of it.

A tired sigh escaped her lips as her eyes looked down and met her right hand. As her eyes looked at the daily remembrance of her mistakes. As her eyes met the reason of a lot of physical, but more emotional pain than anything. She looked down to meet the beautiful ring she had come to disdain in such a short, but at the same time, such a long time.

Once, that beautiful ring had meant everything to her, the world, and the sky. Even happiness, even love. But now, certain prejudicial events made her hate it more than almost everything. She hated it as she hated her father. Now that piece of jewelry meant nothing to her, but suffering… Nothing but hatred… Nothing but her past.

And oh God! How much she wanted to take it off and send it to the nowhere, and destroy it. She really did want to. But, unfortunately, she could not do so. She was tricked, deceived, lured into a trap, into her actual situation. A broken heart. Broken hopes. In short, love.

It was love who made her suffer, bare pain beyond compare. But at the same time, it was love that made her feel alive. Feel somebody. Feel less demon. Feel (if only for a moment) human.

After her great deception with love (though some may think it was her who deception love), she had made a vow to herself. She had privately vowed she would never let herself love again. That is, of course, until the boy wonder appeared on her life.

On her heart.

The boy wonder… Robin. As she thought of this, another sigh escaped her lips.

She loved him. She really did. Unfortunately, she couldn't afford to be together with him, because 1) She would eventually die, and she knew it. 2) She had a very difficult past and surely Robin could not put with it. 3) For the future that lied ahead her, she didn't want him to suffer because of her. 4) The ring she had in one of her slender fingers did not allow her to do so.

So she just stepped aside and let a certain beautiful Tamaranean take Robin all to herself. This shattered her heart into a zillion pieces. Stop! She needed to stop thinking about him right now! Stop!. She screamed to some emotions she had trouble in nevermore every time she thought about her boy blunder.

Wait. Did she just think her boy blunder?! _Well of course kiddo. _A bright pink cloaked Raven said as she giggled. And that just earned her a really demonic glare from the real and actual Raven. Well, enough is enough (and this she knew). So she went to her room.

Once inside, she headed to her bed. But, instead of lying down, she looked underneath it and searched until she found a beautifully carved wood box. She took it out and opened it. Inside it, laid many of her most precious belongings and her most dangerous secrets too. There it was a black leather book that had over 763 pages in blank, ready to write. She had already filled about one quarter of it, and she was decided to write down more on it today, (or tonight in case she couldn't sleep). She then grabbed a really fancy pen, with a sharp point. It was her favorite, as it had been the last gift she had received from a special someone before he died.

The empath then silently walked toward the living room, and she headed directly to the couch. She was getting nearer to the couch, when she noticed someone had beaten her to her most precious spot in the couch.

"Get out of here boy blunder." She then said, no wait, ordered to Robin, who was lying down in a very lazy manner, an almost defying manner.

"Why? I got here first." Her leader said, and Raven just stared at him with a menacing look. Very menacing look. But he seemed to ignore this as he continued

"To put it simply I win. You loose." He said as he stood up and approached me. And that's when she noticed that something about him was not right.

"Sod off Robin." I said (a little bit too loudly) to him. And he just continued to approach her. Definitely something was wrong with him.

"Now, why should I do that, huh?." And as he approached her, she didn't back off. Definitely something was wrong with her too.

"Because I'm not in a good mood today" she replied, more calm but also more dangerously this time. They were at a closeness now that Raven would say was a little bit inappropriate for someone like them.

"Why?". He responded to her statement changing completely the topic of their conversation.

"Why what?." She said, though she got an idea of what he meant. And sensing the masked boy (man) was acting a bit different today, she tried to figure out whatever it was that provoked him into these actions.

"Come on, you know what I mean." He was definitely not drunk or under the influence of any substance that made him dangerous. (Well that depends on your definition of dangerous) so what was it that made him act like this?

"I don't know what you're talking about." (Though she knew exactly what he meant) And he got closer to her, and Raven backed off. They were like this until they were very near to the wall.

What is making him act like this? The dark sorceress kept on repeating on her head and not finding an answer. She did certainly not know that he had figured a little (or big) secret. The greatest detective on the world had deciphered a puzzle that kept him awake at nights: _Does she like me?_ And the answer was too obvious as to not see it, and for that, he punished himself. But he had finally got an answer to the previously stated question. And Robin knew that Raven Roth loved Richard Grayson.

That was what was affecting him right now. This recent discovery. He just needed Raven to confess it, to admit it. This will be the hardest part. So, being the gentleman he has always been, Robin decided to help her a little (perhaps too much). What she needed was pushing, and he was more than willing to give it to her. And this little 'mission' of his was starting right now.

"Oh, I think you know." And how well she knew. But she couldn't afford to loose everything she had just to redeem hopelessly at his feet, declaring her undying love for him. She just couldn't.

"I certainly do not". And she looked away from his masked eyes.

"Look at me Raven." And when she didn't, he gently, but firmly, took her chin in his hand and made her look at him.

"Why won't you accept that I love you and that you like me too? And that simple question made her heart break. It was such a human question. A question that could not be easily, simply answered.

"What you claim to feel for me is just a mere illusion Robin, its nothing more than that." And now, as robin went towards her, Raven could finally back off, but he would continue approaching her and she would back off. They were like this until they were very, very close to the wall now (and to each other too)

"I don't think it's an illusion, Rae. I know those are my true feelings and also your feelings." He said, and as he saw Raven surprised and wondering expression he continued. "I mean, I can see it in your actions. The way you talk to me. The way you care and watch me. And how you feel when I'm with Starfire, you are jealous. I also see it in your eyes. There is love, patience, lingering, and something more but I cannot tell what it is."

"Those things you can see, are just mind tricks Robin." And as Raven spoke, her voice started to falter, to quiver. Luckily, he did not notice that.

"Those are not mind tricks. It's our bond and my great detective skills." and here that cocky smile of his appeared on his face.

"You don't know what you are talking about." She said as she looked away again.

"Maybe you are right. But I do know I love you and you return those feelings." He responded her as with his right hand he gently forced her to look at him again. While he took her hand with his other one.

"Or maybe you are just plain wrong. Maybe you are just toying with me as you do with every other girl. Maybe I don't return your false feelings." She stated. Her voice even now.

"No Raven, I'm not playing with you. Look at me, and maybe you'll be able to accept that I love you." He was now playing with her hair.

"Then prove it" She challenged, and Robin saw this as his golden opportunity. And he was, by no means, going to let it pass.

He locked his lips with hers, and for some reason she reacted in the most primal way: she responded to the kiss, her hand finding his neck and pulling him closer. Robin's eyes widened for a moment, but soon he relaxed and shut them while pushing her into the wall again.  
She pressed his body against hers, and Robin put his hands on her lower back, slowly rubbing her skin with his fingers. Raven's hands moved from his neck to his messy black hair, ruffling it some more while Robin pressured his lips with her again, sliding his tongue inside. Her head was spinning and he softly caressed her cheek.  
Raven fluttered her eyes open once she noticed what she was doing. She then pulled away and pushed him to the side, catching her breath. To the side you could hear him breathing rapidly also.  
Both their hearts were pounding and she widened her eyes.

How could she have permitted this?! How dare he kiss her without any warning?!

"Would you be willing to admit it now?" He said, still close to her, with that lopsided grin of his that she loved so much, but she would never admit.

"I don't love you Robin" she said, looking to the floor. She felt miserable. Here he was, pouring his sentiments to her and what did she do? Reject him. She was a bitch for treating him like that.

"Then why did you kiss me back?" She was left with no possible way out of this. She couldn't tell him the real reason: that she wanted so much what they had done a moment before that she loved him. But no, she couldn't tell him that. If she did, she would screw both their lives, and she wasn't willing to take the risk. She was miraculously saved from having to answer by her team mates.

"I'm gonna kill you grass stain. You'll wish you were never born!!" Raven and Robin spun around to see Beast Boy being chased by no other than Cyborg, who was covered in some strange bright pink liquid. Well, at least it was understandable that Cyborg was in that mood. Unfortunately, neither Robin nor the other bird reacted that fast and they were caught by their team-mates.

"What the hell are you two doing?" Said Cyborg, eyeing them suspiciously, but at the same time obviously surprised by their compromising position. Raven looked up to meet Robin's handsome face, and vice versa. They blushed (and Robin thought _she looks beautiful with that pink shade on her face._) and immediately separated from each other, both looking away, obviously embarrassed (at least Raven was, she wouldn't admit it though). And they were in some trouble now. How the hell would they explain what they were doing?? So Robin started

"We, were just, er, we were-

However, he was fortunately interrupted by a certain red-head that came flying into the room

"Please stop the fighting my friends. I have finally found my Klornak-smitversekn, im sure that it will take out that horrible pink thing that friend Beast Boy has given to friend Cyborg!" Starfire said as she showed something to Cyborg

"Am, Star, is that thing alive?" asked a very concerned cyborg.

"Well, of course, it will eat all that disgusting thing you have." The alien squealed with excitement at the idea of helping a troubled friend.

"Are you sure it won't eat me too?" Cyborg muttered and thank god Starfire didn't hear him. But, unfortunately, she could sense the tension in the air that was created a while ago, before she entered the room.

"Friends, is something wrong? I would be more than pleased to help with anything! But for being able to help, I should know what is wrong first." the innocent and naïve Tamaranean asked.

"Well, actually Robin was going to explain us what's happening." Said Beastboy, looking sharply at the bird couple that was now with a good and reasonable distance between them.

"Um, you see, er we…-

And he was again saved from having to invent an excuse thanks to the doorbell. It suddenly rang through the room, and everyone fell silent.

"What was that?" stupidly asked Beastboy, and at that Raven looked at him with a very annoyed and pissed off look in her pixie face and said

"The doorbell you dork."

"But no one ever rings the doorbell, who would it be?" asked Cyborg, scratching the human part of his head.

"Well, there's only one way for us to see, isn't it? Said Robin as he headed to the door, already fearing the worst. He slowly opened the door and looked to the nothing that had rang their doorbell.

"Well, who is it Rob?" again asked Cyborg trying to see who was it.

"No one, it was some kind of joke perhaps." Answered Robin, and as he was about to close the door, he noticed that there was a little box with a white paper on it that looked like this:

**TO:**

**TEEN TITANS**

He picked it up from the floor and carried along with him to the living room for the others to see. Once he entered he set the box down on the table and everyone stared at it.

"Well, why don't you open it boy blunder and let's get over with this." Said a very annoyed Raven.

Robin did as he was commanded. He opened the box and saw it was stuffed, he took the items that were on it: five pieces of jewelry, one for each titan. He then took a very nice envelope, in which it was simply a stamp with a fancy W on it. Robin smirked, he already knew from who it was but he remained silent. He slowly opened the envelope and took out a letter that had been written with a neat, fancy cursive letter and he started to read.

_Teen Titans:_

_You have been invited to the Christmas Masquerade that will be offered this December the 24__th__ as a celebration to the entire Heroes' altruist work. Take note that this is a __**masquerade**__, so take the consideration to go properly dressed. Tell no one your identity. _

_This masquerade will be offered at the Wayne Manor on, as previously said, December the 24__th__; it will start at the 21 hrs. Be on time, as the ones that come after 9:30 pm will not be allowed to enter. _

_This jewelry has been given to you so you can show it to the guardian as a prove that you are invited to this elite and exclusive ball. If you loose it you won't be given permission to enter. Safety reasons._

_However, you must also pay if you want to enter. The pay form will be send later with the specific instructions. _

_Until then,_

_B.W._

The titans just looked to each other.

**A.N:// well? How was it? Hope you liked it, as I really put a lot of effort on this chapter. I'm not happy with the name of the story, so I will be giving you the chance to name it. Send me a review with the name of your liking. The best one will be the one I choose as this story's official name. So please, please review.**


	4. Scars and new brusies

**Well, what can I say? Sorry for the delay? I've said that enough. Now I can only tell you this year was probably the hardest one in my short life… It actually took me more than a year to update this… **

**Anyway, thanks to all the people who has stuck with this story, You rock!**

**Thanks to everybody who has reviewed and…**

**Special thanks to Akemi1582 who was my beta for this chapter. Thanks a lot!**

**Disclaimer: Teen Titans not mine.**

The young heroes looked at each other and silence fell between them, an expectant silence that waited and longed to be broken. But each titan was lost in their own thoughts to notice anything (not even the mouths of some of them starting to open), let alone make a sound. It could be a funny picture and it was, but not to Raven. With the titans standing around the rectangular table, our heroine felt trapped. It wasn't because her team mates were next to her, but because of her damn emotions, her hormones and because of a certain spiky-haired, conceited, cocky, jerk.

How dare he kiss her without her permission?! She, Raven. Period. There was no need to say more. She was The Raven and that simply called for things to come to a halt. On top of that they have just received a letter saying that they were to go to a masquerade. In this type of party, fancy dresses and exquisite masks were worn by all. Two big shocks in one day. She wasn't sure she could handle it; well at least her emotions couldn't make a fuss and that was a great relief. She then looked across the table and saw that the Boy Blunder was staring at her, or rather at her lips. _He must be thinking of that damn kiss. _Her stare met his and he winked at her. _He winked at me! Things are really starting to get out of control. _

"So is everybody thinking the same as me?" Cyborg said on her left as a really big grin appeared on his face.

"Please friends, what is the masquer of aids?" The alien asked, wanting to get a certain Robin's attention, but also curious as well.

"Actually the name is masquerade and it's a ball Star, this one seems to be a fancy one. In this kind of event you must wear a mask that covers your eyes so no one knows your identity…that's well, in short, a masquerade." The ever oh-so helpful leader answered the naïve alien.

"Dude, this is awesome, we get the golden chance to get some really nice ladies." Beast Boy wiggled his eyebrows at Raven.

"Don't even think about it Beast Boy," she responded and from the corner of her eye she could see her leader tense his muscles and she almost, _almost_ smiled. But nothing could erase what had happened just minutes ago and inside her mind a great turmoil was taking place. So, having the great control she is well known for, she excused herself out of the living room and started walking through the Tower's halls, going up and down the stairs, turning to the left, then the right and somehow she ended up in the dark basement of the Titan's home. Why was she there? She didn't know, maybe it had been her subconscious that had brought her here. But she was already here, wasn't she? So, using that wonderful logic of hers, she started to look around.

The basement held many memories for everyone in the tower. Not collective memories, but the personal ones of each of the five inhabitants of the tower. True, they could have them in their bedrooms, but some memories were just too painful to recall and some memories were not meant to be with them, torturing them every waking moment of their lives. So, they guarded their personal memories with all the others. Ironic it was to keep the things they didn't want to share, even to themselves, with all the others. But nobody ever came to the basement, so it was the safest place to keep something.

She then moved to her own pile of boxes and proceeded to gaze at the letters, books, pictures, and various objects that held so many experiences that could be either so wonderful it almost hurt to remember those times, or so painful it hurt to be reminded of what she had faced and would face in the future.

***Raven's POV***

I thought I recognized most of the objects that were so carefully ordered inside the boxes, but I was proven wrong when I saw a big, old, black leather bound book. What did its pages contain? I did not know, but of course there was only one way to find out. And as I kneeled and reached out to it, I felt an unbearable pain emerge in my back, as if I were being burned. It hurt so much, it was the last thought to cross my mind before my vision turned black and I felt the coldness of the floor welcome my body in a harsh and fierce kiss that made me numb to the pain….

My eyes fluttered open slowly, painfully. But when I, at last, had a clear view of my surroundings I snapped back to reality. Something really strange had happened to me. I tried to sit down, fully expecting that horrible pain to erupt on my back again but, to my utter surprise and relief, nothing happened. That was really weird; don't take me wrong, I was really glad I felt no pain at all, but that wasn't normal, I mean, I should have felt something, _anything_. Instinctively I reached out and touched my back, well I suppose it was my back because what I touched was really wet and sticky: blood, I think... my own blood.

It definitely was that vital, crimson liquid, so I was left with very little options. One was to go to the medical ward and have Cyborg check me, but surely the others would notice what happened to me. I could already imagine the storm ahead, full of questions, and the Boy Blunder would surely worry about me even more than the others… and I really wanted to be alone now. So I had no other option but to go to my room and try to heal and clean the wound myself. I really hoped it wasn't that bad, or I would need someone's help.

Gathering whatever energies I had left, I teleported myself to my room, not risking a walk where I might stumble upon someone. Once I was there I went to my closet and took out a full-length mirror I had in there (don't ask why).

I took off my cloak and to my utter surprise it was dry. Not a single trace of blood in it. So I unzipped my leotard and took it off, I was left in my bra and panties. I observed them and they were also dry. Now this really _is_ getting strange. Why were my cloak and leotard dry but every single time I touched my back it felt wet, wet with my own blood? I turned my neck around so I could watch my back in the mirror. And to my utmost horror I found a scar in my lower back. It wasn't like any scar I had seen before; it was a scar that had the form of a neatly traced Y.

Did I mention before that what happened to my uniform was strange? Well ladies and gentleman meet the strangest thing now. A really odd and unpleasant scar covered by blood. But how did I get it? I'm a hundred percent sure there was no one in the basement besides me. Well, then how would I explain this new … acquisition on my body? I had to ask Cyborg about that security system of his later, but for now I must concentrate on these strange things that were happening to me.

As I looked at the letter closely, I seemed to recognize that handwriting, but as fast as it had come to my thoughts, it vanished, like smoke on a very cold day. The fading memory still lingered in the back of my mind, like a phantom of my most horrible dreams….

Those dreams would have to wait a little more to be fully explored; now I had to clean this horrible wound before it got worse. From a corner of my closet I took out a first-aid kit and proceeded to first clean all the blood. Then I disinfected my scar and tried to decide if it would need stitches or if gauze would do, but add to the list of abnormal things that this scar wasn't open. It looked as though I've had it for years… but still, when I touched it, it felt like a recently opened bruise. Well, at least it wasn't bleeding anymore. That was a relief, considering that I really don't need anymore little surprises for today.

I glanced out the open bay window and noticed with some shock that it was really late. All the others must be finishing their dinner by now, that is of course, if they weren't sleeping by now. Wow! Did I really pass out that long? With some sadness I realized no one had come to check if I was alright, not even Robin… wait. Did I really just think that? _Duh, of course you did! _A little voice from a _really_ far corner in nevermore said. Did that mean I was craving his company? Better not to answer myself.

Suddenly, my train of thought was interrupted by a growl and immediately I slid into my fighting position, my black aura encircling my hands. But my room was quiet and alone, except for me. Another low growl…and with a little embarrassment I realized that these were coming from my stomach. (Hey, even us super heroes have our little moments!) As much as I really didn't want to go right now into the Tower's kitchen, my stomach's noises were really interrupting me. Hopefully nobody was in there. So, I grabbed my leotard and put it on, not being so keen to the idea of going into the kitchen in my current state of undress. I secured my cape to my neck and with a sigh I opened the door of my room, fully intentioned to go as quickly and as silently as I could. My purpose was torn apart by what I found when I opened said door.

There, carefully laid on the floor, was a piece of paper (a note, most definitely), and next to it, there was a plate with three crepes on it with some apple jelly on top of them (and a fork and a knife, of course). Anyway, I shrugged my arms and bent down to pick said objects and, having forgotten my initial desire of taking a trip to the kitchen, I returned to my room, took a sit on the floor, leaning my back onto the bed. I took the note first and started to read.

_Hey Rae:_

_I've knocked on your door quite a few times and you haven't answered. This is the third time I come today to check up on you. And, since it's a little late, I figured you must be quite hungry, considering you haven't eaten since this morning. Anyway, I managed to save these crepes for you before BB or Star ate them… enjoy as they're the only edible thing in the whole Tower. Right now, I've convinced everyone to go to the movies so the Tower is left alone for you. I really hope you're okay. Should you need something, anything really (anything ;D) don't hesitate to ask me. _

_Yours,_

_Robin_

´Idiot´ was the first thing I thought when I finished reading the …uh… message. He wasted a piece of paper only to tell me to eat these crepes. I really had thought it would be an apology note for his… earlier daring act. _But you also cooperated with it, didn't you, darling?_ I just kept silent to that little hooded me that was in Nevermore. She had a point… but he started it, shouldn't he apologize? Well, he _is_ our blunder wonder, shouldn't amaze me really.

Another growl.

Tapping my fingers on the floor, I tried to calm myself.

Another growl.

Damn, did I really have to eat it? My own pride wouldn't let me, but then again, pride is nothing when you're really hungry. So…let's try to be reasonable: I'm starving, and here I have a … gift in the form of food… and I've been thought to be polite, so… I'm really forced to eat it.

What a shame.

The crepes were surprisingly exquisite and even though I wasn't hungry anymore, I found myself craving for more. I put the plate aside and gave a considerably loud sigh. I was quite happy that my father could not cause more havoc on my emotions, because if he could, then, well… let's just say the whole tower would have exploded by now. I was really tired and emotionally exhausted. But I gathered some energy to go at last to the kitchen; you know to wash my plate. As I wandered through the Tower's halls it actually surprised me how quiet this place could be. No videogames, no loud music, no tofu vs. meat fights, no yells, no nothing. It was actually quite… _gloomy_.

Anyway, I finally reached the kitchen and as I was considerably tired, I only put my plate in the sink. As I turned to leave, I heard a noise (take note that it wasn't my stomach anymore). I stopped and listened. But there was nothing. I raised an eyebrow and turned to leave again. But as I was leaving I felt a slender hand grab my arm, and it pulled me around.

I will never forget what I saw.

It was a vision that made my heart ache, that made me feel weak, that made me wish to leave in that moment and never return again, but then it also pulled me to stay and try to help.

That slender hand had pulled me around to face a crying Starfire. She was really a… disgraceful sight. Whatever makeup she had been wearing for tonight had been smeared upon her face and- that look in her eyes.

A look I will never forget.

Her nose was red and her eyes were puffy. I certainly did not know what to do. She was still sobbing, so it would be a little difficult for her to talk. She had already silently called me to probe my friendship towards her, now it was my turn to start the conversation.

"Star?" I asked, really fearful of what might happen next.

"Fr-friend R-Raven… sor-sorry, I shouldn't ha-have bo-bo-bothered you, pl-please forgi-forgive me." And her intention was to turn around and leave, but leaving aside the shock, in a quick movement, I grabbed her arm. Not unkindly, but firmly enough as to ensure she wouldn't go.

"You've never bothered me, please stay, I want to help you…really" I begged. I wasn't keen to the idea of seeing the realities of this world crash all of a sudden against the most perfect of all creations of God.

That was simply and plainly unforgiving and mean.

So we stayed like that, my hand grabbing hers, for quite some time, until she stopped trembling and it seemed she was now prepared to talk. I knew eventually she would.

"Can I ask you something, _friend_?" she asked, turning around, with a hopeful look fighting with sadness for dominance in her eyes.

"Of course, Star, anything you want." I answered, trying to sound the most comforting I could, which of course, wasn't an exactly easy task.

"I uh, I uh… I… dearest Raven, something horrible has happened… uh… well… you know that Robin and I were in a relationship, well…" _were?_ I thought they were still a couple, that _that_ infamous kiss with the bird boy could be classified as… infidelity… from both our parts, "Tonight, at the theatre that displays movies, well, I saw that other pairs were kissing, so I thought that wasn't bad at all. In consequence, I uh… tried to kiss Robin, but he moved his face so that my kiss landed on his cheek. I thought that maybe he was tired, so I tried to grab his hand and he-he moved it away from mine. I tried to not think about it. But I couldn't move my gaze from his face and, eventually, he looked at me for a long time... until he signalled me to stand up and get out with him… what happened next was so… unexpected. We got out of that theatre and then, he told me that I was a great girl, beauti-beautiful and always so-so full of light. That he could only bring dark-darkness to me, and honestly he didn't want that. He told me that I was better off without him.

"But there was something in his eyes, friend Raven, something that was kept hidden intentionally from me. I am no empath like you, but I am no fool. I have seen that look before and I know it so well. So I asked him, just to be sure, if he had fallen in love with somebody else. He then looked at me, wide-eyed and, I was actually expecting him to nod, but he slowly moved his head from left to right. I tried to say anything, to at least ask him the reason. But I just couldn't… I only found the strength to walk backwards some steps and stop. Then I turned around and I ran and ran until I couldn't do it anymore."

She suddenly stopped and some realizations came to me. First of all, Robin had broken up with Starfire. The perfect couple wasn't a couple anymore. Next, he claimed to _not _have fallen in love with someone else. How I wish, with some malice I must say that his answer was the opposite of "no". I gave another sigh. There would be more time later for me to ponder these conclusions. Now, I had a friend in need. A friend, needing not a team mate but a sister; someone with whom she could talk freely about anything, with no remorse or worries.

And maybe I could be that sister, maybe just for one moment in one night.

"Star…" I began to say, but she interrupted me

"I don't believe him, friend Raven. And please forgive me for thinking of Robin as a liar. But this strange feeling in the bottom of my stomach somehow tells me he is lying." She said, biting her bottom lip. She swallowed and continued "I don't believe him, friend Raven. I do think he has fallen in love with someone else. It feels… I feel like trash, like I have been used, like if I were nothing more than a distraction, like… if I were dreaming and suddenly someone waked me up with a slap in the face… Do you recognize the feeling?"

I faltered a little. I wanted to be honest tonight, but I didn't want to reveal some of my past life's events. Finally I went for a short answer

"I do, Star." She looked questioningly at me, maybe if I didn't give her a cutting answer she would start to interrogate me "But it was a long time ago"

"And what did you do with the feeling, how did you bury it? How did you manage to throw it through the window? How could you abandon it in a remote place?" She asked waiting for a true answer.

"You never get rid of it Star. You can try to hide it, you may want to cover it with false assumptions or you may run away from it, but it will always chase you. No matter what you do, no matter where you go or who you are with, it will always be with you. It will always be there to remind you of who you are, what people are like, and what this life is about.

"But it also makes you strong, makes you never want to make the same mistakes again, so you try to improve, you try to go on. You may falter, but you will always stand up until you're able to walk alone, without that person. But remember Star, the feeling will always be with you." I suddenly stopped, maybe I had said too much, but the moment I saw her, I knew it was the right thing to say.

"Friend Raven, how can I go on? How can I move on?" She asked as she sat on the floor. I kneeled down and caressed her face.

"Just be you," I said, "I can't tell you to forget him, because that will never entirely come to pass, but do try to be you, with or without him. I won't tell you to hate him, because he is human and he is our friend, but do try to be yourself. If you live just for you, not trying to fulfil someone else's expectations, if you live just for you, not to please somebody else; if you are yourself, then no one will be able to tear you down apart, no one will be strong enough to make you fall. You may find someone for you along the way, but if you don't, so what? You're still you, and that's what matters the most." I said in a surprisingly low voice.

Suddenly, Star hugged me, and I returned the embrace. For tonight I wasn't Raven the Ice Queen. Tonight I was Starfire's sister, one who showed emotion when it was needed.

"Thanks," she whispered into my ear as she stood up and prepared to leave, but on an impulse I asked her to wait. I went into the kitchen and prepared her some herbal tea and gave it to her.

"You'll be able to sleep if you drink it," I said as an answer to her questioning look. She smiled at me. There was no need for thanks, as silence is sometimes better than verbal speech.

I went to my room to try to sleep, but I couldn't. I tossed in my bed, but tonight's encounter with Starfire worried me, along with today's events. Finally, after what seemed like hours I was able to garner some sleep, but it didn't last long. Soon I found myself awake in my bed again. I sighed. I knew what had to be done, and you're never at peace with yourself until you do what you know must be done. Thanks to whatever forces allowed me to get out of bed despite my tired state, I went down to Robin's room and before I could help it or even think about it, I knocked upon his door.

Some moments later he answered it, pyjama pants and no top, but I didn't roam around his body, I was here for something else.

"How could you do it?" I hissed in a low voice

"Hi Raven, I'm great thanks for asking, and no, I have no idea what you're talking about as I have no idea what are you doing here at this time. You should be sleeping, you know." He said, and I noticed it wasn't the best idea after all to wake up pretty boy from his sleep, but I was already here, wasn't I?

"I mean Starfire. How could you break up with her?" Suddenly his mouth was set in a firm line.

"What happened between me and her is none of your business, Raven. Go to sleep."

"How can I sleep when I saw how devastated you left my friend, huh? How can I sleep, Robin, knowing her current state and knowing that we kissed? His eyes (behind his mask) softened a bit but his mouth stayed the same.

"Come in," was his simple reply. I did, as I didn't want to discuss this in the hall. As he entered his own room he grabbed a shirt that had been thrown on the floor and put it on.

"How is she?" He asked with genuine concern, but he should have already known.

"How could she be when the man of her dreams, the man whom she loves, breaks up with her? How do want her to be, huh?"

He stayed silent, scanning me with an uncomfortable gaze. The silence went on until I spoke.

"She thinks you're in love with someone else."

"I know." I raised an eyebrow waiting for an answer. "She told me."

"I know." I echoed his words.

"So?" He asked.

"So?" I scoffed "So how is it than in one moment you're in love with her, and in the next you turn to someone else?"

"If you listened correctly to what she said, I answered her no. I had not fallen in love with someone else." Yeah, sure.

"Don't give me that bullshit Robin, she didn't believe you and neither do I. So speak, what happened?"

He sat on his bed, looking at the floor, his temper rising at every passing moment. "Why do you want to know?"

"Because I'm her friend and I think that gives me some right to know," I said, speaking in a low voice.

He stayed silent for quite some time. Then he looked up at me and spoke in a soft and slow voice (the tone not necessarily meaning he wasn't angry anymore).

"You do have a right to know, but not only because you're her friend… I answered Starfire no, simply because I just came to the conclusion that I never really loved her…"

In my head the next part of the sentence still resounded "So how can I suddenly love someone else if I never really loved her to start with?" I couldn't help but feel angry at him.

"Then why did you go out with her? Why did you play with her? Why did you toy with her? To have some fun Robin?"

"Damn, no Raven, I never intended to toy with her…"

"But you did," I cut him in mid-sentence "Why?"

"Because I couldn't stand it," he said in a dangerously low voice.

"Stand what? Being alone, you could always pay a whore you know, you didn't have to play with …" now he was the one who stopped me from talking as he suddenly stood up from the bed and shouted,

"Because I couldn't stand my feelings for you Raven! Okay?! Because I couldn't stand being in love with you while you ignored me, while you hid your feelings towards me! It drove me mad!"

I was shocked unto silence.

"Say something." He said.

"What do you want me to say?" I answered, looking at the floor. He forcibly grabbed my shoulders and looked me straight in the face.

"Do you love me Raven? Tell me, do you love me? Or was responding to my kiss simply playing with me?"

He expected an answer.

A real answer.

But it never came out from my mouth.

He went out of his room and left me alone in it. I tried to go out also but a cracking noise stopped me. I had broken a portrait that had been on the floor; probably he was looking at it before I knocked. I bent to pick it up and I saw it was a picture of him and me. I looked around his room and the single picture of Starfire I found was in a team picture. But he had more than four of us together.

I had been so stupid all along.

**A.N:// so what do you think? Was it good, okay or simply lame? REVIEW...**

**Any comments or suggestions are welcome.**

**-rowenagrayson**


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